By: Pierre

Love and Basketball

As we continue to focus on "My First Time" stories, Pierre's experience of losing his virginity continues to open up the perspectives on the trade-in of virginity for experience. 

One of my closest friends during my sophomore year of high school was a girl on my high school’s girl’s basketball team. We became close friends and shared a lot of personal stories. I remember seeing her in first period looking fatigued and drinking from a Gatorade bottle. I knew she was tired because she lost her virginity the day prior. It was something that we talked about a few days prior. A part of me didn’t want to hear it because I had a crush on her, but I was taking notes. At this point I thought that I was “game” ready, but acne, glasses and wild hair amongst other things reduced me to just practice. As a 15-year-old boy I practiced a lot, the dedication was real.

It’s now junior year and I’m going into my first year playing varsity basketball. Our team sucked, but being an athlete came with its perks. The most important was being able to spend a lot of time with the girl’s basketball team. Now, one of my close friends had become my girlfriend. This was about five years after the movie “ Love and Basketball” was released in theaters. Us playing the same sport led to a lot of people being invested.

As we started our young relationship I knew that my time was coming. I knew that my debut was coming. My acne was slowly going away, she would braid my hair and I got contacts. After a few awkward years of not wanting to look in the mirror, I noticed that I was actually good looking. The lack of confidence that I had before was no longer an issue.

I’d done my research, official and unofficial. I’m someone who always likes to be prepared. There has been more practice put into getting ready for this day than anything else. I put more time into this than getting ready for my upcoming basketball season. But this was bigger than basketball.

I knew how to open a condom wrapper and put it on in record time. I knew that foreplay was a must. I already knew that the stamina of porn stars were unrealistic. I read articles on how they could go for so long and I knew that that was unrealistic for intimate sex. But I also knew the shame of not lasting long enough. I used logic and a few techniques that I researched. I felt like I successfully prepared for a final exam.

We left school early one day. Her mom was at work and they communicated often throughout the day. Her two sisters were at school, but they knew that I was coming over. We got to her house and went straight into the room and started kissing, it didn’t take much time for both of our pants to be off. I started being methodical going from kissing her lips, and then to her neck, from her neck to her breast and so on until nothing was left. I had checked everything off my foreplay checklist. Then she grabbed me and told me to come inside.

I had to keep myself from laughing after a few pumps got away from me. Practice is practice, but that game, that game is another beast.  I played it off by going back down on her and let myself recharge. I had a counterattack ready. I felt like Lebron.

Then the front door opens. It was the Golden State Warriors.

A man with a strong and deep West Indian accent calls out for anyone to answer. Oh shit, it was her uncle. A man that was 6’4, 270 pounds and looked like he worked with his hands all of his life. A man from Jamaica with super dad strength. Every time I shook his hand I felt like he could’ve broken my hand if he wanted to.

My girlfriend threw on some basketball shorts and walked 15 feet away into the living room. I roll under the bed butt ass, rock hard and scared out of my mind. I’m 5’11, 135lbs soaking wet. I thought about climbing out the window, but it was parallel to the room door. If I would’ve tried that I would’ve been seen no question. I find my drawers and put them on. At least if I get beat up I won’t be completely naked.

They start talking. At one point they turn on the tv and watch the news. I’m just under the bed playing solitaire on my boost mobile phone in my underwear. After a little less than an hour he leaves. She comes into the room and we awkwardly laugh about the whole situation and what would’ve happened if he ‘d caught me. I nervously get dressed. It felt good to not be cold.

We go into the living room to watch TV. It was still pretty early. Then I start kissing her and we went back into the room and I put on the performance of the lifetime (in my 16 year old mind). I’ve been practicing too hard to not finish the game.

THE FUQS

• Having done real research and learning about sex can be very sexy and helpful in the moment of the act and in the moments before and after
• Sometimes patience is necessary to getting a bigger reward.
• Understanding that sex is a shared space where you and your partner are finding pleasure is impactful.